Two Shows No One Watches

I am an accomplished television afficionado, and even I don't watch these shows! I am baffled as to why they are on the air.

1. Two and a Half Men on CBS

For some reason, this show is consistently ranked pretty high in the Nielson ratings, and occasionally it garners notice from the Emmys. But I have seen absolutely no evidence that anyone actually follows this show. Not to mention, the only reason it’s on my radar at all is because Charlie Sheen is in it, and apparently that guy is a nutcase (despite having a totally awesome, presidential father).

2. Private Practice on ABC

Okay, we all know how Grey’s Anatomy was all the rage a few years ago. It was the show to beat. But what’s with this spin-off series? From what I understand, they took the most disliked character from Grey’s and gave her her own hospital faux-soap opera set in Los Angeles of all places. Now we’re just confusing our universes. See, Los Angeles is where you set your gritty cop dramas, or your let’s-be-meta-and-poke-fun-at-the-our-own-industry comedies (See: Entourage and the short-lived Sorkin drama Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip). Hospital dramas are better suited to places like Seattle, Princeton, or Chicago. You know, dreary places. Because hospitals are dreary.